The Super Bowl is always a blast. The Stalker's and Renne's always get together and drink, eat, gamble, and celebrate Shemp's birthday. We were never sure the exact date of his b-day but we figured Super Bowl Sunday was a good day. On this particular day our front lawn was a sheet of ice(I totally don't even know what that looks like anymore). We had this trick where we threw a treat down the lawn for Shemp to get. Our front lawn is a slight hill, mind you. So Shemp would run after it only to slide down the lawn, it was funny. My dad decided to show the trick off to everyone who was over for the party. This time Shemp slide all the way down to the street as a car was coming. This car had to of been going about 40 mph and missed Shemp by inches. The dude was probally drunk and didn't even see Shemp since he's a black dog and it was dark outside. Needless to say we never did that trick again and Shemp survived another b-day.

Before there was fear factor on TV and before reality TV was even around.  You have our family.

In 1998, our family started a new gift giving tradition that some people call "White Elephant".  Its basically a pool of gifts and each person draws a number.  The first person chooses a gift and is stuck with it, but the next person may steal their gift or pick another.  The last person is in the best position.

Most of the gifts this year were pretty decent.  Barb, (Christmas Boss) just by chance got a couple of really crappy gifts and joke gifts.  One of which was some S.P.A.M and some pickled pigs feet.

Well after that I think my brother and my Uncle Dennis talked about how he would eat them for money.

This soon turned into all of the Brat Patrol (Me, Noel , Kevin , and Dan ) wanting a bunch of money to eat the pickled pigs feet.

I am sure some people really eat these things, but they stink like formaldahyde and vinegar or . . . Read More..

One time in our AP Biology class, our teacher Mr. Mandley had us discect a cat.

I am sure this is nothing new to most high schoolers and I guess this is a common memory among people going through school.

But I guess I will just explain some of the things I remember just for my own documentation of what went on.

We all gathered in groups of 4.  My group was Millicent , Jessika , and I cant even remember the 4th person that was in our group now.  I think it was another guy.  He was kind of in one of those other clicks if I can remember right.  He even used to play this Neo Geo handheld a bit in class.

Anyway, we got our corpse of a cat and we named him Quequog.  (After the character in moby dick).  Our cat wasnt just any old cat.  This fucker had the most obscure and large organs as well as skin that is as tough as a pigskin football.

We first had to skin the fur off of it and that I can recall took an entire class period.

The rest is just . . . Read More..

At my cousin Robin's wedding, my family was having a fun drinking party in my Aunt Barb's suite killing time the night before her wedding.

I was talking to Ben and Steve at dinner explaining a fun game to them that I had played in college with my cross country game.

For those who havent played it, its called "Fuzzy Bunny".  The object of the game is to stuff as much food as you can into your mouth.  Something like crackers or cookies will work fine.

On this particular night, uncle Paul had his video camera, so you guys can enjoy the funny videos of me getting my butt whipped by my cousin Steve who has THE ABSOLUTE LARGEST MOUTH ON THE PLANET.

Enjoy.

Noels recent memory about being in Elementary School and stuffing things in his mouth, reminded me about a time that we were learning about the 5 types of tastes and learning about which sections of the tongue taste certain flavors.  To test this, we had an assortment of items like sour juice, bitter coffee, sweet sugar and much more.

Everything was fine until the students placed coffee beans on my mouth and I practically choked.  I spit them out immediately and blew so hard that the coffee beans went all over the place.

It was a complete mess.